I can understand someone being in a state of mind at one time, that they would never dream or imagine being in in some other circumstance. I think it's very shitty that she ended her one and only life so soon, without seeking help or trying to some way, feel better or obtain happiness.
In my opinion, you have to have some serious balls to take your own life; especially if you are religious and know that in most religions, you're damned to hell. I personally don't know and am not here to judge. But for that to be one thing that no one knows the answer to, you really have to not want to be here anymore. I mean, I cannot imagine any other world than this one. Yes at times it can be very shitty, cruel, and unforgiving. But in my experience, it usually gets better; at least unto a point in which you can smile and think to yourself, "What was I thinking?" I like to think those people don't go to "Hell" or none of that non-sense. I like to think they get to be born into another life and be faced with those same circumstances, and get to retry their hand at taking it easy, and relaxing, and realizing that life is the most beautiful, shortest, and most longest events we will ever experience.
I just hope she was able to have her questions answered, and peace was bestowed upon her by whatever lies next for all of us.
I'm sorry for your loss, Phoenix. I just hope her situation helped some other person experiencing the same things not make the same decision she decided to make.
As I will also reiterate, life can get pretty tough, but here at CAG we are a family. My ears will always be open for my brothers and sisters that may need to vent or just let a stranger take the wheel and just... Listen. As my uncle was also a man that took his life. March 14, 1993. It's a day I'll never forget, and I hope that in the future, people will realize that suicide is not the end of their suffering, but a brand new beginning of sorrows for all individual involved that pushed love and affection in the direction of the dearly departed, depressed angels that never sought help.
I hope they finally have their wings.
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